BOREDOM

Man...... This bites.
I'm at the radio station doing a football game, and it's really boring.
I was thinking today, about how I would deal if my grandpa died, and found that I would actually be ok......... Becuz, whether he dies or not, I still keep living,a nd he was a Christian, so why let it affect me? It's becuz I couldn't find my mother, and my bro called, and was wondering if my grandpa was ok... and I had no idea that anythign was wrong... He said that grandpa had fallen down..... It kinda scared me.. but, I had to work in about an hour, and even if I had found that grandpa had been in the hospital, I still would've gone to work, because, my life will go on.. IT's sounds so morbid,and so sad.... but, seriously, if you think about it, you are going to live... even if someone else that you care about dies. Be sad, but don't be unfunctional.
Hahaha, Wow.. I should really shut up. Anyways,
Later.

FREAKIN!

Hey... It kinda makes me suspicious the fact that on your blog, you said that you didn't want to talk about things on the computer... Does that mean they were about me? Cuz, I don't know.. I guess I'm just really insecure or somethign!
HEY! They are going to make me a supervisor at work!!!!! WOOT!!!!! OH SO HAPPY.
I gotta go.
Later.

WOOHOO

I am toatally done with my homework! WOOT! Too bad a certain someone couldn't be coming up tonight!;)
Well, this week should be a lot of fun and really interesting.. considering the next couple of days I'm just gonna be running around doing everything imaginable....
Hopefully, you can come up and see me, Tim.. I mean, stay over night.. Yeah.. You wouldn't be able to actually come to school... But, I would see you after school.... Although, I would totally feel like I was ignoring you the whole time, cuz I have so much drama stuff.
Well, I wanna go check and see if you emailed me.
Later.

{uhhh}

Haven't really had much to say..... The only person who really reads it is Tim... Hahahaha... Since I talk to him on the phone, it's seeming kinda pointless.. PLUS there are some things that I would ponder about him on here, if he wasn't reading it... But, he is... so, I will just have to ponder INSIDE my head.
I stayed at my grandma's last night becuz my dad worked all night, and I'm a wuss....... Hahahaha.. Yeah, I'm proud of it.....
I wish that life was a little easier, and not everything was always chaos. That would be nice.. But, for now, I will just have to deal.
Later.

Good day/ Bad day

It seems that everyday starts out fine,and by the end of it, it has no longer any meaning, and no longer any glint of joy in it. I feel run down every night,and find myself crying every night. What can stop this? I beg God to be real to me, and to give me some sort of different day. So far no answer. Maybe this is all a test for me... Who knows.
Yesterday was an ok day... overall. There were MANY moments that we more than horrible. Why can't I stay strong every day, all day? It's like I am slowly being drained by things that affect my world.
Later.

AHHHHHH!

So much homework! I have absolutely no time to write right now, but I will later. Homework is such a hassle... Don't you agree? Later.

Oops

I forgot to bring my homework to work tonight. I am working at the Radio station tonight. Stink! And I forgot to bring my homework. Well, I will just have to call my dad and see if he will bring it. Hmm.. Maybe he will.
Things seem to be going well.. Almost too well.. I don't remember the last time I was feeling SOO GOOD! Well, maybe I just feel somewhat closer to God despite my insecurities, and my stress levels. Anyways, I'm gonna go call my dad.. I'll be back later.

WOOT!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
HAHHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA! (gasp)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!
OK.. So sorry. Ever so often I just get in this mood of extreme weirdness, where the creepiest things entertain me. Like now. Hehe.. Anyways, Life is good.. and I'm tired. My homework for tonight is very little.. and that makes me happy. Even better than that, on my worst moments, God is by my side. I recall a time where I was praying and bawling, at a winter retreat we had, and this guy (named Aaron) was praying for me, and trying to push me backwards and make me fall down. I refused to let him budge me....... If anyone was going to bring me down, it was God... As Aaron was praying for me, God's Spirit pushed me flat on my face FORWARD. There was no Aaron involved in my movement towards the ground. God did so many things and I was laying on the floor bawling and screaming and kicking. He totally healed me of my pain and hurt from bitter past... It was so cool. I remember a comment later from a friend: he said, "Man, it was so cool. I was sitting back in God's presence watching you get prayed for. The fact that your body flew forward instead of backward totally assured me that God was genuinely touching you, and I thought that was SO cool." God is great. Anyways, that's it for now... I'm out of here. Later.

Oh Baby!

Hey! I guess my sister is in labor right now, and I'm praying for a safe delivery, and a bouncing baby boy! Hmmm.. On a different side of things, I am going to do my best to remember that when times are tough, no matter how rough, God is bigger, and HIS benefits overwhelm even the worst situations. So I can move on because He has created me to. I have found myself feeling apart and depressed lately...... I guess it's just been because of overwhelming circumstances and such.... I don't wish to be in that place, and God has bigger things for me than just mediochre. So I will press on even with my problems, and even with my sins, and know that God will carry, and God will forgive. His mercies are new each morning, and I will rise with the morning, and take them with me throughout the day! Later.